The method of raising each mother differs from the other, and therefore she is disturbed by attempts to interfere in the upbringing of her children, but she must deal intelligently with these interventions without disturbing any of the relatives.
As soon as the news of pregnancy spreads in the family, you start hearing tips and recommendations regarding taking care of your health and the health of the fetus, and after birth, these tips increase to turn into interventions in the care and upbringing of the child.
And because there is a great difference between the way of thinking and education in the past and the present, the advice of grandparents is often unacceptable, so how can we deal with these annoying interferences?
Methods of dealing with educational interventions
There may be some positive, useful advice on raising your child, which the mother or mother-in-law often says, but this does not mean over-interference in raising the child and how to deal with it.
That is why we tell you some tips to deal in a good manner with the interventions of excessive people.
Set boundaries from the start
This does not mean that you deal badly with the people involved in raising the child, but do not give them the opportunity to interfere in the first place, and let this be an agreement between you and the husband after a session of quiet consultation and persuasion.
When the interveners feel that you are putting an end to their interference, and that their attempts fail and that you adhere to the way you raise the child, they will avoid doing this later.
Do not be sharp in dealing with people, because they are your relatives and care about your interest and love the child very much, but at the same time, they are convinced that the method of education is wrong and their method is the correct one.
It is advised to apply this with Western people who are trying to break into your life and know all the details, such as neighbors or co-workers, as these people are rejected from their interference and have no right to deal directly with your children and raise them because you do not know the truth of what is inside them.
Listening to opinions without reacting
When the interfering person finds that you apply what he says immediately, and you feel convinced of what he always says, his interference will increase, but if you listen to him without reacting to the child, he will realize that you are not convinced of this opinion.
For example, if your child is crying and one of the intermediaries asks you to give him what he wants to stop crying, do not apply this because you are making the child link crying and achieving what he wants.
The solution here is to listen to this opinion with a simple smile without any action, otherwise, you will enter into a big argument that may cause many problems.
But if you have to respond, let your response be that you follow a specific style of education with him and you cannot change it, then try to talk about another topic.
Take advantage of their advice away from the child
It is the ideal solution to deal with such situations, so you can ask them to give you advice and experiences and leave you the choice, provided that the intervention with the child is not direct, but there is no objection to alerting you about their opinion on education.
This solution is suitable for people who understand your point of view, but there are some people who consider this to be offensive to them, especially if the degree of kinship is great, such as the grandmother, so you feel that you prevent her from dealing and direct contact with the child.
Therefore, you must be careful when talking to her and do not embarrass her or attack her in front of the child if she interferes, but sit with her alone and tell her your opinion in a polite and elegant manner.
Another way to prevent interference in a child’s upbringing is to send indirect messages to those who try to interfere, for example, telling him that you do not like someone to modify your child’s behavior, and you would prefer to be the owner of this behavior.
You can also tell him that there are people trying to interfere in the upbringing of your son, and that you are upset about this matter, but you do not want to embarrass them, so you prefer silence.
These indirect messages may be understood by some, and others may not, but they may close the door to the interfering persons.
Tips to reduce the chances of educational interventions
In order not to give anyone the opportunity to interfere with the upbringing of your child, do the following:
Preventing interference from the beginning: If the interfering person finds that you accept this because you are embarrassed by him, and you enter into discussions about your child’s problems and your inability to raise him, he will continue to do this and it will be difficult to stop him later.
Do not quarrel with your child in front of anyone: because of course there will be a reaction from this person, and the journey of interfering in the child’s upbringing begins from here.
Do not complain to anyone about your child: this will give him the courage to intervene in the child’s life and start doing actions with him because you have come to him, as he feels that you need this intervention.
Be your child’s friend: because this reduces the problems between you, and the child will not resort to actions that require the intervention of people or the child’s start to complain to anyone else.