An ordinary interaction between a parent and a child will turn into a shouting match by yelling at a defiant, screaming child. Your child might take your answer as a verbal battle invitation. This is only going to make matters worse. It is up to you as an adult to lead the discussion to a practical conclusion. Help your child appreciate the need to do something or act in a particular way.
Do what it takes, meditate, workout, or listen to music, to remain calm. Play soothing or calming music at home so that your kids can listen to it. Insert your child’s favorite music once in a while. You can obtain their ‘vote’ in that way, and also encourage them to unwind.
Your child is unlikely to embrace control if you impose it on him. Here are a few ways in your relationship that you can model respect:
- Seek cooperation, do not demand that orders be adhered to.
- For all your kids, have consistent guidelines, and do not be lax just because you find it convenient.
- Empathize with them, never ignore their emotions or thoughts.
- Let your kids do for themselves what they can, resist the temptation to do something for them, to reduce their responsibility. This also shows them that you have faith in them.
- Say what you’re talking about and do what you’re doing.
- Lead by example, according to Betsy Brown Braun, the author of You’re Not The Boss Of Me, the mantra that you should follow here because your kids are watching you all the time.
- Work with them
Children who are stubborn or strong-willed are particularly sensitive to how you handle them. So be attentive to the tone, body language, and words you are using. They do what they know best to defend themselves when they become uncomfortable with your behavior: they revolt, talk back, and show hostility.
- Changing the way a stubborn child approaches you can alter how they react to you. Partnering with them rather than asking them what to do.
- Using sentences such as “let’s do that…” and “how do we try that…” instead of “I want you to do that…”.
- To get your kids to do something, make use of fun games. For instance, if you want your stubborn child to put away their toys, start doing it yourself and ask them to be your “special helper.”
- You may still have time for the activity and encourage the child to put away the toys quicker than you can. This is a sly trick that works for the most part.
Often, bargaining with your kids is important. When they are not getting what they want, it is normal for them to act out. You need to know what is keeping them from doing so if you want them to listen to you.
Start by asking a few questions, such as, “What bothers you?” “Is it something that matters?” or “Would you like anything?” “To make them learn about it. This shows them that you appreciate and are willing to accommodate their needs.
Negotiation doesn’t necessarily mean you always give in to their requirements. All is about being considerate and realistic.
For instance, at a set hour, your child could not be willing to go to bed. Instead of demanding, try to discuss a bedtime that suits you both.
Create a congenial environment at home
By observation and practice, children learn through. They will learn to mimic it if they see their parents arguing all the time. Marital discord between parents can lead to a tense atmosphere in the household, affecting the children’s mood and behavior. Marital discord can lead to social withdrawal and even violence in children, according to a study.
Understand the child’s perspective
In order to better understand the actions of your stubborn kid, try looking at the situation from their viewpoint. Put yourself in the shoes of your child and try to understand what they have to go through to act in such away. The more you know your son, the more you’ll be able to deal with his stubborn streak.
Even though not giving in to their requests, empathize with the boy. Although being strong, you should understand their disappointment, resentment, or frustration and support them.
If your child is not able to do their homework, for example, he or she is frustrated by the assignment. You can help by breaking down the homework into smaller tasks that can be done in a short time if there is too much to do or if your child is unable to concentrate. To make the task less difficult for them, you might include brief, one or two-minute breaks between the assignments.
Reinforce positive behavior
There will be moments when you will not know what to do to control your frustration and violent actions with stubborn children. But if you respond without thinking, you can develop a negative attitude towards the issue and even unintentionally strengthen their negative actions.
For instance, your child can say “No! No!” “To almost everything that you say. Think about it. Do you say a lot of “No”? If yes, by example, you are reinforcing negative actions.
The “Yes” game is one way of altering the negative reactions of your stubborn kid. Your child must say “yes” or “no” to anything while playing this game. “Questions such as “You love ice cream, aren’t you? “Do you love to play with your toys, do you?” “or “Do you want to see if tomorrow your dinosaur will be floating in the bathtub? “They are likely to get your child’s “Yes.” The more your child reacts positively, the more likely it is that they will feel understood and valued.
How to teach a stubborn kid with a potty?
Potty training is challenging as it is, but it can become a pain when you’re dealing with a stubborn kid. You can potty train your stubborn and violent three-year-old child by:
- To learn about it.
- Explaining how it is applied to them.
- Don’t get serious if your child refuses to use the bathroom, make it fun.
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