Many people believe that practicing positive discipline is synonymous with a child with no rules, letting them do whatever they want, and being indulgent. This is because we have been taught years ago that proper education requires punishment and tyranny, but is it really true?
Positive discipline seeks to help adults raise children through mutual respect, and kindness, but without tolerance.
Now let’s think a little? Have you ever stopped to think about the characteristics you want your child to have in the future?
You might think some like:
However, in order to develop these and other characteristics such as love and trust, we, as parents and educators, have an essential role in this process.
According to Jane Nielsen when applying the penalty method is:
1. Resentment – where the child feels that it is not fair and cannot trust the adult.
2. Revenge – where the child feels that the adult is winning at that moment but can win.
3. Rebellion – where thoughts such as “I will not do this, because I will prove that I do not need to do things his way” appear
4. Retreat – thoughts like “I’m a bad person”
As children grow up with these feelings, they may have wrong conclusions about themselves or may look to others for approval.
We adults vary a lot in our mood and behavior according to the situations we experienced that day, causing us to switch between tolerating and overly controlling, but when we are aware of these moments, we have the opportunity to think and act in a gentle and grounded way.
Please share the article with the families and professionals you work with